Nerd Stuff Listicles on Ranker (#24-30)

There’s no better kept secret on the internet than the articles I write for Ranker.com… until now! One of these babies has over 2.4 million views. Millions! Which one? You’ll have to read to find out, but it has to do with sex and a TV show with a title that rhymes with Schmame of Schmones.

—————————————————————————————————————-
-important-events-that-happened-before-game-of-thrones-even-started#24 – Game of Thrones Backstories that Happened Before the Books Even Started

This was extremely fun to write. It’s probably the second or third or thirty-ninth best (unofficial) prequel to A Song of Fire and Ice you can possibly read! Though practically everyone involved is already dead, readers seem to think that the whole Rhaegar-Targaryan-kidnapping-Lyanna-Stark thing will be a prominent storyline in the seasons to come whilst poo-pooing on Jorah Mormont and Mance Rayder’s storylines.
—————————————————————————————————————-
Morrison#25 – The Best Grant Morrison Comics of All Time

I barely remember writing this one, but it’s all true. All-Star Superman has bubbled to the top, but my pick will always be The Invisibles and Morrison’s plea for a spiritual “wankathon” to keep the book from getting canned. It was my introduction to “chaos magic,” which I’m still not any good at.
—————————————————————————————————————-
George-RR-Martin#26 – Surprising Facts about George R. R. Martin’s Writing Habits

Writing about how someone else writes their writings was one of the more grueling things I’ve been written to to write about. I can’t deny that GRRM is a quirky dude, but I guess I’m a quirky enough dude that I’m only surprised that he doesn’t have quirkier quirks. The most surprising fact about him is that he’s not more arrogant or precious about his baby (like the hacks that are currently ruining The Walking Dead). I also like his hats.
—————————————————————————————————————-
efrem-zimbalist-jr-in-batman-the-animated-series-photo-u2#27 – The Best Alfreds in Batman History

Back to comic books, or at least, comic-book-based properties for me! I had kind of assumed that people would vote the movie actors up to the top of the list, so I’m happy to see that Efrem Zimbalist Jr.’s portrayal from Batman: The Animated Series has risen to the lead. Ranker rankers know what they’re ranking about.
—————————————————————————————————————-
just-one-of-the-guys-photo-u6#28 – 22 Unexpected Nude Scenes in Movies

It looks like Jason Segel’s wiener is still holding down the top spot on this list. Boobs are downright commonplace, but a surprise wiener can be the most unexpected nudity of all. I originally posted uncensored images with the understanding that someone at Ranker was going to make black bars, but I guess they just went for bare-ly related screengrabs. I’m sorry, Mr. Skin, I have failed you.
—————————————————————————————————————-
MTM1MzA2ODU4NDIzNjMzOTMw
#29 – Game of Thrones Sex Scenes That Aren’t Even in the Books

This list appears to be non-voteable, which is a shame, because it could be ranked by scandalousness, egregiousness, or gratuitousness. But you know what? I don’t care. That’s because it has, at the time of blogging, 2.4 million views. If I had a penny for everyone of those views, I think I’d have like $24,000? I think it makes sense to amp up the visual intensity of a book when it’s being adapted to the screen, but these scenes have made some folks (who probably still wear buckles on their hats) get all huffy. I only get huffy over the ones that involve drastic character and/or plot changes.
—————————————————————————————————————-
game-of-thrones-religions
#30 – Game of Thrones Religions Worth Believing In

People are just not into the Lord of Light! Voters would rather turn their lips blue or be confused, beaten and blinded by the Many-Faced God than join up with R’Hllor, and I dunno, learn how to ressurect the dead? That seems cool to me, but I guess not everyone is onboard with burning children at the stake. Sign me up!
—————————————————————————————————————-

Nerd Stuff Listicles on Ranker (Lists #8-11)

I’ve been spinning out nerd lists for Ranker.com at an advanced pace, and falling behind on posts here! So I guess I’d better catch up. If you want to read them all you can click the tag for my Ranker recaps. Per usual, I’ll add my comments on how people have seen fit to re-order my articles with their votes.

biggest-retcons-in-comic-history#8 – The 30 Biggest Retcons in Comic History

This is a wonky one to vote on. I went with “Biggest” in the title so I could rank them based on their impact and influence on the world of comics. I’d imagine people are voting as much for that as they’re voting for “Best” and “Worst.” Some of these are awful things to have to read or even try to summarize (Xorneto), and some of them are fantastically well written (Supreme). A lot of the most important ones have risen to the top, but no one seems amused at the fact that WWE is reprinting comic books just to have CM Punk removed. I guess that’s just me.
—————————————————————————————————————-
the-most-destructive-things-that-have-ever-happened-in-comics#9 – The Most Destructive Comic Book Events

This was a tough one to write, because comic book destruction is just so massive. I guess when it only needs to be drawn, it’s easy to crack open a script and write “So, our story begins when a planet gets blown up and ends with total galactic annihilation…” I had to reach into my (admittedly sketchy) grasp on space opera comics, because that’s where the worst things happen. This list also confirmed what I already know, which is that nobody in the world likes Irredeemable as much as I do. It’s the only entry with more than one downvote.
—————————————————————————————————————-
promiscuous-comic-book-characters-u3#10 – The Most Promiscuous Superheroes in Comics

This was right up my alley! We toned down the title from “sluttiest superheroes,” but since male characters are still hovering around the top, we might’ve gotten away with it. Mystique has flown up from my original position, which I guess means that people assume that a hearty percentage of the sex in the Marvel Universe is Mystique duping other mutants. Meanwhile, Captain Dynamo’s gotten a free pass for his five children from five different mothers.
—————————————————————————————————————-
vgreligions#11 – The Coolest Religions in Video Games

This was a little something different for me. I think my video game knowledge is pretty decent, especially starting around three console generations ago. I suppose you could call this my most controversial list, since just about every entry has a 50/50 split in upvotes and downvotes. I’d never want to join, but Unitology is my favorite, it’s so insidiously integral to the plot of the Dead Space games. If there’s any belief system I really embrace in real life, it’s the cosmology of Mass Effect. Get ready for the Reaping! I’m also a little sad that nobody likes the Lovecraftian stylings of Eternal Darkness: Sanity’s Requiem.
—————————————————————————————————————-

best-deadpool-comic-book-storylines-ranked